Three months being a mother...

 "Come to aunty!"

That's what I said to my son the other day and I just can't laugh at myself. I'm used to be an aunty to tiny human, my nieces and nephews and now it's my son!

When I shared this with my family and hubba, they said " x sedar diri lagi!!" hahhaaa

Yes, sometimes I just can't believe that I am a MOTHER!!

When I wake up every morning, I saw my son and I just can't believe it! I carried this little human inside my tummy for 38 weeks, delivered this baby... tergamam I! I do all that???

Before I get married, I'm really scared to give birth especially when my sisters shared their story with me. I am honestly very scared!

But, after get married, I pulak can't wait to have a baby...haha but I do still feel scared but my husband always give me strength and tell me I'm not alone on this.

As this article written, I am just being a mother for three months and here what I learn and feel so far.

1. Always in a dilemma

I feel a dilemma when I spend more time at the office or being late come back home. 

I feel a dilemma when I feed him formula milk than breastmilk. I've tried my best, just no luck on fully supply breastmilk to him.

2. Always feel life is full

When I saw my hubby and my son at home every day, I feel my life is complete/full. I don't know how to describe it, I just feel complete. Now, I know this is what people say, life is complete. It really makes me happy.

3. Need to learn how to calm down...like ALWAYS!

Whenever anything seems something wrong with my son like he cried so much and seems uncomfortable, I always mengelabah or panic. But, seeing our friend, Wiwi able to calm my son make me think, I need to calm down always, don't panic.

4. Manja always

This a bit too much information (TMI) but this is what I feel, I cannot miss this on the list. 

I always feel manja with my hubby...

I think I want his attention because seems like all his attention on our son...I get jealous sometimes. 

Also, I always emotional and sensitive nowadays. My hubba marah/tegur sikit, I will ambil hati and merajuk hahhaa

Thanks to God my hubba tahan and sayang me hahahaa

Sorry my hubba...

5. The baby fat 

Arghhh... I can't wait to lose it. But, not yet! I still want enjoy life. I can't wait to be slim ahaha

This one still work in progress.

So far, I enjoy motherhood. I enjoyed it because I'm having a wonderful son and awesome husband. Not to forget our friend, Wiwie that taking care of our son while we go work. Wiwie, you're amazing.

To new mum out there,

every mum has a different kind of motherhood journey. If you feel hard now, please be patient. This shall end. Enjoy every moment.

Love,

Aya